Baby Steps

So many mothers watch and wish for their babies to start crawling, then pulling up on furniture, then cruising and eventually walking all on their own. I am not one of these mothers. While I celebrate each developmental marker with all the excitement and happiness of a proud mama, I can't help but feel a little sad as we pass each milestone. Already my sweet little baby is crawling all around on his own, he doesn't need me to transport him everywhere like he used to. As he was nursing today I looked at one of his bare feet and was astonished that it is larger than my palm now! Where is the teeny tine little baby food I wrapped my hand around just a few months ago?! Then my mind wandered to thoughts of those precious little baby feet someday carrying him out into the world, without me there to watch and protect him. There will come a day when he is old enough to to deserve and desire his independance from me, and although I know it is many many years down the road, I can't help but start to dread it already. I wonder if all mothers go through this? It seems like with each incremental baby step he takes as he grows up I also take a baby step, in the direction of facing the reality that someday I'm going to have to watch him walk out into the great big world all on his own. Another of the beautiful things about being a mother, growing and developing right along side my amazing little dude :)

**As I wrote this post I had Kaleb playing on the kitchen floor under my supervision. Somehow he managed to find a leaf that the dog had tracked in. I turned and saw something dark on his chin, and as I went to him he started gagging, I figured out it was a leaf, and just as I was wiping it off his face and picking him up to clean him off, he puked from gagging. Hmmmmm, perhaps having him go out into that world won't be the saddest thing after all ;) I swear, you can't make this stuff up!